Brian Feenstra was the only man in America who looked at a deer crossing sign and thought, “That’s not a warning… that’s a business opportunity.” Thus, Deer Dash was born — the nation’s first meat processor with a slogan that sounded less like a brand and more like a police report: “Fast. Fresh. Possibly already in your headlights.” Brian had a unique approach to entrepreneurship. While most startups worry about supply chains, Brian just waited by rural highways during peak “oh no” hours and called it vertical integration. Now, Brian’s schedule was… structured. Let’s just say he didn’t exactly clock in—he more checked in. His “work release program” was less about career development and more about convincing everyone he could be trusted around sharp objects and livestock-adjacent situations. The guards, to their credit, were supportive: “As long as he brings back the apron and doesn’t try to trademark ‘accidental venison,’ we’re calling it progress.” Despite everything, Deer Dash took off. Hunters loved it. Drivers feared it. And insurance companies… absolutely refused to comment. Brian’s proudest achievement? A drive-thru window. Because nothing says “farm-to-table” like: “Would you like that processed or… still emotionally unresolved?”